Childhood Purpose

When I was eight years old, I went on a mission trip to Mexico. My parents, brother, and our prayer pastor hopped on a flight to Mexico City. I remember arriving at Roca Mission our first night—running on the beach and thinking, Wow! I get to stay here. For years after that trip, I told everyone who would listen that someday I would go back as a missionary. Someday, I would return to Mexico, sleep in a hammock with my dog, and never get married! Well…one of those dreams came true three weeks ago. I am back in Mexico, serving as a missionary, and walking in the fulfillment of my childhood dream.

Usually, I don’t remember much about my childhood. It’s kind of blurry, or I’m not sure if things really happened. But the memories at the base in Oaxaca, Mexico, are distinct and clear. I still remember the colors, rooms, car rides, and yummy food.

Recently, I shared this with one of my leaders at Journey School. I asked, “Why is that trip so clear to me, while other childhood memories fade?” My leader suggested it was because of the purpose. That mission trip to The Base was purposeful. Even at eight years old, I was living by my core values—which I now know include purpose. The purpose of that trip impacted me. Running pop-up hospital clinics, giving kids backpacks full of goodies, visiting families in their homes, and just getting to play. Even play had a purpose. We were showing kids who Jesus was by playing football with them! Mexico changed my life and planted a seed for missions in my heart.

Reflecting on Purpose

This idea of purpose got my wheels turning. I do everything I can with purpose—but sometimes that can be a weakness.

The past five months have been incredibly growing. Every day, I am learning and changing through experience, adventure, service, and so much more. I have a great desire for growth. I feel purposeful and most content when I am growing. When I was interning at my church, I felt purposeful. When I am leading, I feel purposeful. When I try new things—even when it’s uncomfortable—I feel purposeful.

But purpose cannot come before or above God.

This morning, I led my team’s Bible study at 8 a.m. The Lord asked me to talk about idols. An idol is anything that comes before or above God—whether you are aware of it or not. Through prayer, I realized that the purpose of my mission had become a little off. My purpose was earthly and physical, not eternal and spiritual. Yes, I’ve been loving the kids, teaching class, and working in the garden. The problem was my focus. I was focused on teaching English and painting a mural. My focus should have been on being the hands and feet of Jesus and doing everything for the glory of God. That misplaced focus left me feeling drained and lost. My earthly purpose was at the forefront, replacing God’s eternal purpose.

If you can’t tell, God has been teaching me a lot lately. To be honest, the past two weeks have been challenging. I’ve been living in a constant state of stress and unrest. Earlier this week, I asked God to show me the purpose of returning to Mexico if I couldn’t be fully present or find joy in ministry and life in community. Yesterday and today, He has gently and quietly begun reminding me of His strength. That I cannot do anything in my own strength—my body, mind, and spirit will fail. But in the Lord, I am sustained. I can live a purpose-filled life, but first I must learn to rest in Him. I can do great things for the Kingdom, but only when it’s for God’s glory, not my own.

Philippians 4:13
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

Seven months ago, I signed up for Journey School, and my childhood dreams of mission life had faded into the background. Five months ago, those dreams resurfaced, and I realized I was actively pursuing them. Four months ago, I left the U.S. for Europe. Three weeks ago, I arrived in Mexico—back in the place I dreamed of as a child—praising God for returning a dream I once held so tightly.

Childlike faith is powerful. At eight years old, through the power of the Holy Spirit, I knew with assurance that one day I would return. Now, I am here in Mexico, living with over 100 kids who need Jesus deeply. They come from broken lives and are ready to be loved in a new way. I get to help teach these kids English, restore a garden to provide them with resources, and help paint a mural—all of which are incredible gifts to me. I am living a purpose-driven life in Mexico. There are challenges and lessons I am learning through that, but really, God’s goodness is beyond my imagination!

His plan is infinitely better than we could ask, think, or imagine. All we have to do is desire His heart. Ask God to reveal His purpose for your life—because when you walk with purpose in the world, you have the opportunity to change it.